There's got to be a morning after Superbowl commericals

I didn't actually watch the Superbowl,except for the halftime show with the Rolling Stones(which was about as exciting as watching your not-good-to-be-rejected-by-American
Idol friends sing along to a Stones Greatest Hits CD)but thanks to the magic of the internet,I was able to check some of the commericals that have become almost as important as the game.

First up was the Jessica Simpson Pizza Hut ad,where she replays her sashaying from
Dukes of Hazzard music video as she feeds a typical geeky teen boy one of those new
pop crust things. Pizza is getting too damn complicated these days-remember when the
big deal was getting extra cheese? Now,you can pratically have a Sunday pot roast dinner as a topping with mashed potatoes as crust filling with gravy dip. Pizza
should not have dipping sauce! As to Jessica,I'm sure she'll sell some slices but
this sucker won't stir up as much fuss as the Britney Spears Pepsi ad did(or even
that Carl's Jr. ad,where the burgers were bigger than Paris' breasts).

Then I saw the Caveman FedEx ad-not bad,looked pretty pricey just to get folks to
not use UPS. You kinda of feel sad for the poor caveman-first,his message gets
eaten by a T-Rex,he's fired for not using a company that doesn't exist(abit too
realistic there)and then,is stomped to death. Real upbeat and cheery there,fellas.

After that,I watched the Dove soap commerical about promoting positive body images
for young women. It's a nice idea but it doesn't make me want to buy soap. You feel
more like watching WE or Oxygen while Oprah hands out Dr. Phil's latest book to her
audience members.

Finally,there was the Ford Hybrid car ad with Kermit the Frog. Some folk may weep
and nash their teeth at this but hey,if Snoopy can sell insurance,why not buy a car
from a Muppet? It was short,sweet and simple and ended with a happy Kermie getting
a ride home(or about to,in theory). If you're gonna take the word of a Muppet for
a great new car deal,Kermit is the one I'ld listen to. Certainly better than Elmo
anyday(besides,Elmo's too young to drive in most states). The winner of the Superbowl
battle of the ads is clearly won by a green mile. Ah,well,there's always next year!