Wednesday, May 24, 2006

Can you judge a movie by it's poster?

There are many ways to decide if a particular movie is right for you-who's in it,who the director is,how the trailer looks,is there a Happy Meal tie-in and if so, is the toy cool?

We all know the old saying"You can't judge a book by it's cover" but nobody's ever applied that to movie posters. Sure,a bad film can have a cool poster and vice versa yet another thing to consider is what do the makers of this film think of their target audience? Let's look at a few samples of upcoming movie art:





The Lake House is supposed to be one of those"lovers separated by magical means" movies but frankly,I think Keanu looks like a vampire in this picture. Check out his over the shoulder pose and how extra scary and pale b&w makes him look. Too bad the Lestat musical is closing down because Matrix Boy would blend into that cast nicely!




You just gotta admire the subtlety here: scary little boy on swing with big monster dog at his side and oh,gee,is that an upside down cross I spot there? Not to mention all those references to the number 666-do you think this movie is about some kind of Antichrist or something? Didn't they already make a half dozen of these movies years ago,back in the ancient times of the 1970s? There must be a new angle here-oh,wait of course,Mia Farrow's in the movie! Yeah,Rosemary's Baby Momma,that doesn't reek of stunt casting...not!




I know Nic Cage is the star of Ghost Rider(even saw the trailer online)but my guess here is that the studio wanted to draw in the die hard comic book fans with a cool image of the hero rather than remind them of the actor under the CGI. Is it just me or does the pointed end weapon on GR's look a tad...well,the phrase"ribbed for her pleasure" comes to mind. Oh,I'm a bad,bad,very bad person...let's move on,shall we?




You know,in some ways,I'm already sick of hearing about this movie and it's not even being advertised that much. The poster says it all,don't even need to mention any of the actors in the movie since we all know Samuel L. Jackson's the star. That logo for some reason makes me think of the G.I. Joe cartoons back in the '80s. I wouldn't be suprised if someone from C.O.B.R.A. just popped in at one point to cheer the snakes on.



Okay,this freaks me out-the hands coming out of nowhere theme is pretty much a classic standard by now but whoa,Nelly! I'm not sure who's the one getting dragged into hell and beyond there(might be Kristen Bell who is in the movie,too bad it's not Lindsay Lohan-she deserves some payback for Just My Luck)but it's definately not a position you'd want to be in,ever. Got to admit,quite a spooky image there. Hopefully,the movie will deliver on it's promise.


If this is any indication of what the Oliver Stone version of 9/11 is going to be like,he should just do everyone a favor and just walk into a theater and start smacking the audience members in the face with a bag of bricks. It would be a hell of a lot faster,plus the crowd would get a fair shot at repaying him in kind. Nic Cage is in this one,too and yet,his face is nowhere to seen again-coincidence or conspiracy? You decide!



I want to end this post on a positive note so here's a look at the Pirates of the Carribean 2 poster. This is a movie that says"we know what you liked last time,so here's more of the same,plus a sea monster!" There better be a sea monster otherwise that giant tentacle rising from the waters is a total tease. I wasn't crazy about the first film(it was too damn long and the only thing that elevated it from your standard Disney Channel fare was Depp's performance designed mainly to amuse himself)and doubt that I'll see this one onscreen but you must admire the confidence on display here. You have the three leads front and center,a prominant logo and an overall design that styled very old school Hollywood. Say what you will about Disney but those fellas aren't insanely rich and powerful for nothing.

2 comments:

  1. Snakes and planes in the same movie??? Are they trying to kill me???

    Oh and if Oliver Stone does to 9-11 what he did to the Kennedy assassination, a bag of bricks upside his head won't be enough.

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  2. They swear that Ollie's gonna be a good boy this time but I have my doubts.....

    You're not afraid of a cute lil' snake,are you Jake? Planes,I get but not a cuddly snake:)

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