Friday, August 24, 2012

Bad Movie Month plays the Best Songs from Bad Films


It turns out that we have a spare slot in our Bad Movie Month schedule,so today's topic will be a playlist of tunes from my personal selection of guilty pleasure music from bad films. Speaking of guilty pleasures,Once Bitten is an all time favorite of mine not only for it's awful blend of vampire cliches and sex comedy tropes but for the songs attached to the soundtrack as well.

Most of the fans of this film fondly recall "Hands Off",which plays during the infamous dance battle sequence(the main reason to see this movie,folks)but I also adore the theme song performed by the band 3 Speed.

The lyrics and the beat are a perfect match for a funky vampire movie of the eighties,too bad it wasn't given a better forum. Maybe some group out there can do a cover version for The Vampire Diaries or True Blood,stranger things have happened!:




Next,we have Bobby Brown's contribution to the sorry sequel Ghostbusters 2,which is a catchy little number that includes a brief synopsis of the plot in rhyming refrains. Now,it turns out that Brown didn't write the song "On Our Own"(that dubious honor goes to L.A. Reid, Darryl Simmons and Babyface),otherwise a good joke could be made about how easily Brown managed to make "evil" rhyme with "legal".

The video is noted for it's numerous celebrity cameos,which included Christopher Reeves(well before his accident),Donald Trump and SNL alumna Jane Curtin. Hey,why was Jane Curtin good enough for a bit part in this video but not for any of the Ghostbusters flicks,huh,guys? Then again,maybe that was for the best:




Now,I didn't see the 2009 disaster flick 2012 but I think Adam Lambert's video for the movie's theme song "Time For Miracles" may be far more entertaining to watch.

In this performance piece,Adam casually strolls through the devastation as he sings his awesome power ballad like he's the little brother of the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse who wants to get his last lyrical two cents in. As much as I like Lambert,not even the amazing high notes that he can reach were enough to save the world from this massively mediocre film:




Yet,this wasn't the first time that the producers of 2012 went to bat for a monster of a movie. In 1998,a remake of Godzilla was unleashed on the public with the soundtrack's main song being a powerhouse tune by Puff Daddy aka P. Diddy aka whatever name he goes by these days.

"Come With Me" received some negative PR due to the song basically being a revision of Led Zepplin's Kashmir but since Jimmy Paige was credited(and appears in the video as well),I don't have that much of a problem with it.

What's hilarious about the whole thing is how the video is like a mini action film starring Puff Daddy whose music is strong enough to defeat even a transplanted monster roaming the city streets. Sorry,man but I think I'm rather have Mothra at my back,with or without an entire orchestra on call:




Last and possibly least in our line-up is "Far From Over",the title track to Staying Alive,the Sly Stallone directed sequel to the '70s disco classic Saturday Night Fever. I mention Stallone only because his brother Frank got the gig for this tune,which was actually nominated for a Golden Globe for Best Original Song.

This pumped up theme has had an extensive shelf life,with the instrumental version being used for the pro wrestling series Starrcade and several sports shows to boot. As over the top as it is,this song can't be any worse that any of the numbers from Spiderman:Turn Off The Dark,which makes the Broadway show in this film(Satan's Alley)look like Stephen Sondheim in comparison:



We have to shut down the jukebox for now but tune in next time,when Bad Movie Month treads with caution towards Sex And The City 2. Please say that you'll be there:









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