Having a few Happy Birthday laughs with Lincoln

With this being a long holiday weekend,due to President's Day,I thought it might be fun to start things off with a salute to one of the men who made this extra day off possible,Abe Lincoln. Yes,Washington's birthday is also thrown into the mix officially but when it comes to the perfect go-to guy for presidential humor,Lincoln just seems to fit the bill so much better.

Perhaps,it's the stove pipe hat or the beard,plus his long lean look. Whatever his enduring allure is, Abraham Lincoln really possess a certain air of dignity that folks can't resist tweaking a little. While giggling is considered inappropriate in history class,these less than respectful depictions of Lincoln practically demand your mirth:



One of the comedy troupes that love to mock Lincoln is The Whitest Kids U Know and they truly do comic justice to that night in Ford's Theater. This first skit has Abe(Zach Cregger) and his wife Mary(Timmy Williams) fending off an intrusive stranger(Trevor Moore) who keeps hassling them during the play.

What amuses me greatly about this sketch is how much Timmy resembles Mary Todd Lincoln. Seriously,the guy is a dead ringer for that particular First Lady(no pun intended,I swear!)and gets off several good lines here as well:



The Whitest Kids' other Lincoln skit is one of their most popular routines and is a favorite during their live stage shows. I've had the pleasure of seeing this one in person a couple of times and it keeps getting funnier every time I see it. I also would love to see the play-within-the-play version of Hamlet,with the vampire army invasion included(a whole lot of cussing in this one,you have been warned!):





Long before The Whitest Kids,the gang at SNL took a swing at Lincoln lunacy with this short film that asked the question "What if Abe Lincoln had a time machine and knew how he was destined to die?"

Longtime SCTV regular Joe Flaherty plays Lincoln,who becomes the Terminator to John Wilkes Booth(played by Kids in the Hall cast member Dave Foley as an adult),who seems to have developed a rather strong motive over the years for ultimately eliminating his mysterious enemy.

The only SNL performer on deck here is Julia Sweeney,in a brief performance as Mary Lincoln(no offense,but Timmy still is better in this role):





Speaking of alternative history,Seth Grahame-Smith's Abraham Lincoln,Vampire Hunter is tops in this gruesomely entertaining field.

One might think that Lincoln would have been more suited to stomping out the likes of werewolves,this portrayal of Honest Abe as the Van Helsing of the Civil War is pretty convincing,to say the least.

While there may be more "factual" books on the shelves that focus on Lincoln,they won't be as fun and action packed as this tasty little tome is:





It's a shame that the Tim Burton produced adaptation of Abraham Lincoln,Vampire Hunter won't be at the multiplexes this weekend. We'll have to wait until June to see this hysterical history lesson come to life on screen but at least there's a trailer to tide over us until then.

So,Happy President's Day weekend,folks and do turn some of your thoughts to the legacy of Abe Lincoln during this time. It may not seem reverent to remember our sixteenth president in such a mocking way but at least he is being remembered. Not too many jokes are made about Franklin Pierce or James Polk,for example and it's better to be amusingly memorable than easily forgettable:

Top Chef TX plays a few hunger games,Downton Abbey's Sybil suitor and a family affair on The Vampire Diaries

The Final Four on Top Chef Texas went to British Columbia(for the geographically challenged like me,it's in Canada)to partake in a trio of events to determine who would go on to the finals in Vancouver.

The winner of each event would receive ten grand and a guaranteed spot in the Final Three,which exempted the first two winners from competing in the next round. The first hurdle to conquer was making a dish while riding aboard a moving gondola.



During their trip,each contender had to make a pit stop and grab an extra ingredient to add to their plate. Lindsay found some quinoa and used it as the base for her seared salmon to rest upon.

While all of the chefs delivered quality food here,Lindsay was the winner of this event,much to her great relief.



That left Paul,Sarah and Beverly to face the next obstacle,which was to cook outside and get their ingredients out of blocks of frozen ice,I kid you not.

Paul was not only extremely helpful to his competitors in smashing the ice chunks to get the grub out,he also gave Sarah some of the crab meat he had for his dish.

She made a nice pea and spinach soup with almonds and Beverly whipped up some sweet seared scallops but Paul's brown butter poached King crab with chutney earned him the victory here. Seriously,this guy has amassed quite a small fortune before hitting the last legs of the competition-it's almost too good to be true.



Then it was down to Beverly and Sarah. They had a biathlon,which meant that they had to ski cross country(in a small loop)before making their way over to a target shooting range to select their pantry.

Sarah,despite her boasts,wasn't that great of a shot but she did wind up with getting the protein of her choice,rabbit. She braised the leg and served it with cherries,a sauerkraut puree and a slice of rabbit heart on top. Even though a couple of the judges felt that the meat was a little tough,Sarah won the third spot for the Final Three.



Beverly's arctic char was slow roasted,something that was a bit of a risk for her,but her entire plate was considered to be well executed for the most part. The fish was accompanied by a beet compote and celery root truffle puree,which Judge Tom praised rather highly.

However,the char was slightly overdone and it's flavor was diluted in the process. That sadly lead to Beverly having to pack her knives and go home,with no second chance awaiting her.*sigh* I was so rooting for her to beat out one of those gals but at least Beverly seemed to have earned the respect of her fellow chefs with this last round and that's something you can't truly put a price on.

Next week,the Final Three head for more challenges that will see one of them leave but not before being put through their culinary paces:





There were dramatic developments just about every other minute on Downton Abbey this week,what with Matthew being able to walk again,Lavinia dying from a rather convenient case of cholera and Mr. Bates going up on murder charges(you know that his soon-to-be ex-wife wouldn't just quietly shuffle off the mortal coil like that).

Amidst of all this turmoil,Sybil finally came to a decision about Branson and the two of them tried to make a run for Greta Green(P&P's Lydia would be so proud!). Mary and Edith headed them off at the pass(okay,a local inn)but that didn't stop Sybil from standing up for herself there.

I have to admit,this romance didn't seem to be very viable but the passion that both of them displayed in fighting for their right to be together was most impressive. Eventually,Lord Grantham gave in(partly out of guilt over his own near dalliance with a house maid,I suspect)and no doubt,the Dowager Duchess will lend them some support along the way. Odds are,however,that these two won't really need it but it's nice to see it being offered,anyway:



The finale this Sunday is a Christmas themed episode,with gifts and cliffhangers galore,not to mention an interesting token of affection being given to our dear Dowager Duchess Violet:





On The Vampire Diaries tonight,the roots of more than one family tree are bound to become even more twisted as Damon's brief bedroom encounter with evil Original sister Rebekah causes tension between the Salvatore brothers to rise up higher than ever.

Granted,there's never been a level playing field when it comes to sibling rivalry with these boys but since Klaus' mother is keen on a plan to eliminate their mutual enemy(which could keep their beloved Elena safe),it would be good for those two to settle down somewhat:



RANDOM NOTES:

MASTERPIECE CLASSIC: The next big mini series on the line up is a two part version of Great Expectations,with Gillian Anderson playing the Gothic eternal bride in waiting,Miss Havisham. There will be more Dickensian dramas on deck but this one is a definite must-see:

Romantic dinners,take two

With today being considered one of the most romantic days of the year,a big part of most Valentine's Day plans involve a dinner date of some sort.

Whether it's at your favorite restaurant or a simple meal in the comfort of your home,nothing could be cozier than sharing supper with your sweetie. Plenty of nice romantic moments have been created,on screens both big and small,around this savory set-up for love.

As an appetizer for your own Valentine's feast or just a seasonal pop culture snack attack,here are a handful of amusingly amorous dinner dates:



A classic pop culture dinner date is the alleyway restaurant tryst between Lady and The Tramp,with a lot of bells and whistles attached to it that most humans strive to meet for sheer romantic quality.

For a mongrel pooch,Tramp certainly knows how to entertain a gal in style. There's excellent mood lighting,live music,an intimate setting,plus a tasty plate of spaghetti and meatballs to share. What's not to love about this?:





The film Julie and Julia not only told two love stories about women discovering their true talents via food,it was also a tale of two marriages.

Most folks were out and out charmed by the devotion between Julia and Paul Child,who were far from shy when it came to expressing their feelings towards one another. This was a couple whom Valentine's Day was made for,as this dinner party sequence showcases so well:





There have been a bounty of suggestive eating scenes over the years,such as the messy blindfolded taste test in 9 and 1/2 Weeks,which infer that the dining couple's appetites are more inclined to be satisfied elsewhere.

The grandfather of those erotic edible moments is thought to be found in 1963's Tom Jones,where our hero works up quite a hunger as he shares a table with a beautiful stranger at an inn. The savory tension is truly thick enough to cut with a knife and then some:





Granted,stalking isn't at all romantic but it appears to be the only option for the lovelorn villain in Dr. Horrible's Sing-a-long Blog. The title character sings of his despair while spying on his would be girlfriend Penny as she has a dinner for two with his sworn enemy Captain Hammer.

Of course,Penny is the only one truly happy in this situation,as she fails to notice both her lurking laundromat buddy but the indifference of her date,who is less than thrilled to be eating at a homeless shelter. Love is blind in more ways than one here:



Happy Valentine's Day,folks and I hope you all enjoy your romantic dinners. I also hope that you actually get to have your meal in peace and avoid being interrupted by someone else's lover's quarrel. Those disagreements can really wreck your dessert plans:

A set of cinematic swan songs for Whitney Houston

It was with a heavy heart that news of Whitney Houston's death reached us over the weekend,with many tributes to her memory still under way from fans and friends alike at this point.

The Grammy awards ceremony last night honored the loss of one of their most cherished songstresses,complete with a touching rendition of "I Will Always Love You",Whitney's signature tune from her first major film role in 1992's The Bodyguard.



As a salute to the pop culture legacy of Ms. Houston,I have set up a small play list of her songs that were tied into the various film projects she participated in over the years.

Starting with The Bodyguard,where she played Rachel Marron,a celebrated diva who was being stalked by a crazed fan and needed the services of Kevin Costner's title character,a movie that was adored by audiences and slighted by the majority of film critics.

The music from the film was immensely popular,becoming one of the best selling soundtracks of all time. Two of the tracks were nominated for Best Original Song that year at the Oscars,"Run to You" and "I Have Nothing"("I Will Always Love You" wasn't eligible,due to being written years before this movie was made). Both of these songs were amazingly wonderful ballads that deserved to be recognized in their own right,with the latter being quite the show stopper:





One of my personal favorites from The Bodyguard soundtrack was "Queen of the Night",a funky little number that let both Whitney and her character cut loose on stage. Sure,she was known to do some dance ready songs but this one had a little more edge to the groove there:





Houston's next big film was as part of an ensemble cast in Waiting to Exhale,an adaptation of Terry McMillan's popular female friendly novel. Whitney played Savannah,a successful TV producer who kept putting her romantic future on hold in hopes of her married lover being one day free to be by her side.

This movie was considered more of a serious role for Whitney and she received plenty of praise for her performance. Granted,audiences once again loved it a bit more than the critics but this film was seen as more of an artistic step up for all involved than a cinematic step back.

Whitney contributed two songs to the soundtrack(which featured music from numerous contemporaries such as Mary J. Blige,Brandy and Aretha Franklin),with one of them being the title track for the film called "Exhale(Shoop)".It's a thoughtful and touching tune that accents the themes of the story in a subtly sweet manner:





A couple of years later,Whitney starred in a remake of the Christmas classic,The Bishop's Wife,which had her co-starring with Denzel Washington playing the Cary Grant to her Loretta Young.

The Preacher's Wife also reunited her with one of her friends from Waiting to Exhale,Loretta Devine. The film did decent box office but it was the soundtrack that really made a huge impact with folks.

Still to this day,it is considered to be the top selling gospel album of all time and the album received a number of nominations(plus a few wins) from both music and film associations,including the Academy Awards and the Grammys for that year. Whitney's cover of a Four Tops hit,"I Believe in You and Me" was a strong standout track from this album and earned her two Grammy nominations for that one alone:





Her next to last movie role was in a made for television remake of Rodger and Hammerstein's Cinderella as the Fairy Godmother. Whitney was one of the producers and originally cast in the lead role but she wisely chose to have Brandy play that pivotal part.

That worked out well for the both of them. The musical chemistry between Brandy and Whitney was one of the highlights of this production and despite being the third version of this musical,the film was an instant ratings hit.

The movie garnered several Emmy nominations,winning one award for Art Direction. This was meant to be a revival of The Wonderful World of Disney,which didn't last long,but there was wonderment all the same:



I ,along with many longtime fans out there,send the family and personal friends of Ms. Houston my most sincere condolences and sorrow for their loss. Seeing such a pop culture princess depart from us much too soon is hard to bear but remembering the best of her at this time,rather than the worst,is the kindest thing we can do for those who knew her well. No doubt,where ever her spirit now resides,Whitney Houston is being shown the love that she gave so generously to others through song:

Caught in a Rotten Regal Romance

Valentine's Day is next week and that tends to put folks in the mood for love,especially for love stories on film and screen.

One of the most enduring set-ups in this genre is the royal romance;meeting Prince or Princess Charming,overcoming a few obstacles along the way and then a big wedding with tons of pomp and circumstance that seem to guarantee a happily ever after.

While it is nice to dream about,in both real and fictional life,royal unions don't always lead to regal bliss. In fact,some of them can be as pleasant as long term prison sentences. To make my point even further,here are some examples of tortured titled couples who didn't end up as ideal as say,Kate Middleton and Prince William:



QUEEN CERSEI /KING ROBERT

The central royal couple in the first book and season of the Game of Thrones series,these two got off to a bad start on their honeymoon when Cersei quickly realized that her new husband was still mourning his former sweetheart Lyanna and would be forevermore.

Not that he was such a bargain to begin with,but resorting to making sure that he wasn't the natural father of any of her kids(yet keeping things in the family,if you know what I mean),speaks volumes about the depths of Cersei's resentment. Sadly,the only thing they had in common is their undying hatred of one another:





HENRY THE EIGHTH /ANNE OF CLEVES

It's fair to say that choosing a bad relationship amongst the six wives of King Henry VIII is no easy task but one does have to feel extra sorry for wife number four,Anne of Cleves.Their marriage was of political convenience,however that wasn't the root of the problem between them.

When Henry finally saw her in the flesh(having only a commissioned portrait to go by),his disappointment in her looks was vehemently expressed to his counselors. Despite his objections,the marriage did take place but only lasted for less than a year. Lucky for her,Anne simply had to agree to an annulment and got to keep her head,unlike her replacement Katherine Howard.

Anne of Cleves is not always highlighted in most tales about Henry the Eighth but she has had her fair share of pop culture exposure. Her most recent depiction was on the last two seasons of the cable miniseries The Tudors,where ,regardless of the historical inaccuracies within the script,
the awkwardness of her interaction with King Henry is keenly felt:





"PRINCESS" CARA /MARGRAVE OF ROXTHENBERG

An episode of Legend of the Seeker required slightly reformed Mord Sith Cara to impersonate a princess as part of a plan to rescue Kahlan from the dungeons of a Margrave,who was auditioning candidates to replace his meek yet no longer young wife.

Cara's attempts to act ladylike and demure weren't entirely successful in charming the smug Margrave but by reverting to her more forceful self,she managed to leap bounds over her competition. That victory ultimately lead to Cara showing the Margrave what she really thought of him and his notions of "right and good" once and for all:





QUEEN VICTORIA/JOHN BROWN

Even when a monarch is legitimately free to find new love,people always find a way to make that search all the more difficult. During Queen Victoria's bereavement period after the death of her beloved Albert ,which drew her into seclusion from the wider world,she received true emotional comfort from one of her servants,a man named John Brown.

Mr. Brown encouraged her to rejoin society,which caused rumors of a secret love affair between them amongst her family and royal advisers,not to mention political enemies. Due to pressure from within and without,their relationship was eventually severed yet Brown stayed in her service faithfully until the end of his life.

Their story was captured on film in 1997's Mrs. Brown,earning Judi Dench a Best Actress nomination at the Oscars that year. She lost out to another(yet won the BAFTA for that same role),alas,much like the queen did when it came to choosing between politics and love:



It is nice when fairytale romances do appear to come true but even those who are to the manor born are not immune from being unlucky in love. Call it schadenfreude,if you will,but it can be comforting to know that romantic relationships can be agony for regal folks,too:

Top Chef TX honors their mentors,Downton Abbey vs. the Super Bowl and a third serving of Worst Cooks in America

The first order of business on Top Chef Texas this week was seeing who would be returning to the competition,thanks to Last Chance Kitchen. Emerging triumphantly was Beverly,which seemed to peeve a few of the remaining chefs(namely Sarah).

They then went on to the Quickfire Challenge,which was to pick items out of the TC pantry while blindfolded and make a dish using each one. The winner would get their choice of prizes;a new car or a guaranteed spot in the Final Four.



Sarah won this round with a corn soup that had peaches and mushrooms in it,yet it was deemed more favorable than Ed's soup with pork casing stock(he thought it was pancetta). She immediately went for the Final Four spot,which let her off the hook for cooking in the Elimination Challenge.



For the Elimination,the chefs had to make a dish that showcased the type of cooking that their mentors enjoyed and taught them to do. Since Sarah didn't have to take part in this challenge,she got to hang out with her mentor Tony Mantueno instead.

Joining the judges were the other four mentors,which included former Top Chef Masters contender Michelle Bernstein(Lindsay),Tyson Cole(Paul),Sarah Stegner(Beverly)and Frank Crispo(Ed) and this reunion of teacher and student brought plenty of tears as well as joyful memories.



Bev took a real risk in preparing her food wok style,which has to be timed precisely or the whole meal is a loss. It's particularly difficult to cook this way for a large number of people and she received major props for pulling it off.

Her Singapore noodles with barbecue pork and shrimp were delicious,not to mention very pleasing to her mentor. This dish placed Bev in the Top Two for this round and showed why her return from Last Chance Kitchen was well earned.



Paul was next to her in the winner's circle and won this challenge with a seemingly simple soup.

He used chilled sunchoke with summer veggies and a dashi broth that felt out of place when tasted on it's own yet when poured over the veg ,and eaten over time,came together in flavorful harmony.As his reward,Paul won the car that Sarah passed on. Between this and the close to forty grand that he's gotten already during the course of the competition,he's miles ahead of everyone here.

Let's face it,folks-Paul winning the whole shooting match would be great but if he doesn't,it is not like he would be walking away empty handed here, unlike some of his competitors.



Meanwhile,Lindsay was on the chopping block due to the amount of dry herbs in her seafood stew. She did a twist on the usual stew recipe,with couscous and a creamy broth that didn't gel as well as the one Paul used on his dish.



Sent off to pack his knives,however,was Ed. As much as the judges loved the braised pork belly and out and out adored the pickled vegetables on his plate,the flavor of the oyster cream was way off.

Ed's decision to use canned smoked oysters when he couldn't find fresh was his downfall here. Too bad,because even with his occasionally snarky attitude,the guy had his moments there. No Last Chance Kitchen for you,pal,sorry!

Next week,the Final Four leave the warm climate for the chill of British Columbia but the heat is still on high for the competition. Personally,I'm rooting for Beverly all the way now and hope that she buries mean girls Lindsay and Sarah in the snow.



Downton Abbey faced it's worst enemy this past weekend,in terms of time slot that is. The show did rather well up against the Super Bowl,coming in second place in the ratings that night.

Some of the PBS stations were wise enough to replay Downton at ten,giving those who love sports and British melodramas a proper chance to indulge in both:





Plot line wise,there was much to celebrate as WWI came to an end but poor Lady Edith's heart was broken yet again by a badly burned officer claiming to be Patrick, the former heir of Downton who was reported as a casualty of the Titanic.More than likely,he was an impostor on the make yet you can't help but feel sorry for Edith in this situation.

She may have been conned but,other than her father,she was the only one who took the time to talk to this guy about his back story(which was a tad far-fetched there). Not to mention that Edith did have strong feelings for him all along, which must have been known to the "real" Patrick in order to be a ploy for the fake fellow. When it comes to love,this girl just can't catch a break.

More post war hijinks are on the way,as some of the Crawleys look forward to reclaiming their former way of life and others find the new fashions appealing. Mr. Bates,meanwhile,has a mixed blessing as his troublesome wife dies under circumstances that could divide him from Anna for good:





Season three of Worst Cooks In America debuts this upcoming Sunday,with Chef Anne Burrell going up against famed Iron Chef Bobby Flay to see which one of them is best at whipping a raw foodie into culinary shape.

Chef Anne has so far beaten two guys,which puts some pressure on Flay there. However,he does strike me as a fairly relaxed man and moderately easy going when it comes to instructing others,unlike former team captains Irvine and Macmillan. Yet,the daunting task of dealing with kitchen misfits might be harder than facing the Chairman in Kitchen Stadium for Flay:



RANDOM NOTES:

GAME OF THRONES: Season two is set to begin on April 1(not a joke,I swear)and the wait is true torture indeed:

A bit of cheer for Charles Dickens' 200 years!

Today marks the 200th birthday of author Charles Dickens,the creator of such iconic characters as Ebeneezer Scrooge,The Artful Dodger and David Copperfield,known through the world. His works have never gone out of print and are the constant source of film adaptations for screens big and small.

While many of his books are either required reading for high school students or taken up as serious study by collegiate folks,Dickens was first and foremost an entertainer. Yes,he tackled many a strong subject and criticized social injustices in his day but his messages came across all the better with a touch of goodhearted humor,whether silly or satirical.

In that spirit,we present a lively look at the life and legacy of Dickens. After all,what's a party without a few laughs? Plus,mixing some fun into factiods adds real flavor for thought:





As mentioned earlier,many of Dickens' novels have become major motion pictures for both theaters and TV over the years,with numerous remakes and updates.

One of his most popular melodramas,Great Expectations,is now being relaunched on both fronts with Tim Burton making his own Hollywood production and a new miniseries set to debut on PBS Masterpiece Classic this spring.

With such dynamic actresses as Gillian Anderson and Helena Bonham Carter playing the ultimate Dickensian drama queen Miss Havisham,watching these takes on the darker side of bridezilla mania could be educational in more ways than one:





A real delight of any Dickens book is the elaborate names given to even the smallest member of his numerous cast of characters. While some were based upon actual friends,family and acquaintances,how many of them were truly flattered to have their surnames attached to the criminal types(Bill Sykes) or greedy business men(Jacob Marley)that routinely cropped up in the books.

Most of the more memorable names came straight out of Dickens' head,proving that his imagination was really boundless in this regard:





Dickens was a major fan of the theater and loved performing on stage whenever possible. From readings of his own work to appearances in stage productions,Dickens enjoyed being in the spotlight and no doubt would approve of any and all adaptations based upon his writings.

A few years back,a comedy troupe called The Reduced Shakespeare Company did an offbeat musical tribute to Dickens and his literary legacy. Their show, Dickens Unplugged, is not for the rigid minded but I suspect that C.D. himself would have been laughing it up in the front row:



With that,I wish Charles Dickens a very happy birthday and long life to the wonderful stories that he gave us all,a gift that does keep on giving. Many of Dickens' themes are still relevant,especially with these times of strife before us,but we should take away one positive point from his books and that is despite our struggles,it can be a fine life: