Most of the big Hollywood hype is going to the Indy Jones movie that opens up tomorrow and the Sex and the City flick next week. However,I've been seeing a few other trailers for movies that plenty of folks will put down their hard earned money and/or credit card for because either the bigger movies were sold out or out of sheer boredom.
I get that,but they have direct to video releases for a reason,people. A good example of what I'm surprised is not one is The Strangers,starring Liv Tyler and Scott Speedman as a well to do young couple who go off to a country house for a romantic weekend and get terrorized by a trio of masked maniacs who apparently don't get good cable reception or even have a Netflix account because they seem to find freaking out a pair of city slickers to be the perfect entertainment for the weekend.
Not only is this concept more played out(right down to the "based on true events" tagline) than a Atari game,the couple in question truly seem too stupid to live. "Why are you doing this to us?" Uh,because your husband is such a genius than instead of calling the cops right away when seeing a weirdo hanging out in his driveway,he goes outside to confront him. And you're really a big help there, by cowering and shrieking right behind him. Yeah,plus you were home,too:
Due to hit theaters in September but being advertised right now is Beverly Hills Chihuhua,another live action animal film that has the four legged characters speak with celebrity voices(Cheech Marin, George Lopez,Salma Hayek,Drew Barrymore).
Sure,it looks like a cute little kid's movie but somehow I seem to be able to have a bit of that high frequency hearing that dogs are supposed to possess,since I keep hearing a subliminal message during the trailers that says"Hey,kids;stereotypes are fun-tastic!":
One of the more trickier challenges this summer movie season is deciding which looks
less funny;Mike Myers in Love Guru or Adam Sandler in You Don't Mess With The Zohan. Both SNL veterans have given us some good laughfests in the past,but these two movies come across more as a Battle of the Bad Foreign Accents.
Sorry,guys,but it's going to take more than some goofy outfits and obvious sight gags to pull either one of these movies off.Fellas,seriously,stop sleepwalking
on screen here and make a real effort to do something original and entertaining. The younger generation of comedians are fast upon your heels and ready to take the wheel:
NO LOVE FOR THIS GURU
I DON'T WANT TO MESS WITH THE ZOHAN,TRUST ME
Mike and Adam,if you don't want to listen to me,then just watch this trailer for Eddie Murphy's upcoming July release,Meet Dave, and treat it like a visit from the Ghost of Bad Movies Future. This makes Norbit seem sophisticated.
Oh,Eddie,why,why? Haven't you learned the perils of doing overblown sci-fi comedies by now? Wasn't The Adventures of Pluto Nash a sign unto you?
I know that you feel ripped off after losing out on the Oscar for Dreamgirls(you were great in that movie)but that should drive you to do more challenging and quality work,not fall back on cheesy special effects and pitiful attempts at fish out of water humor:
Well,fellow movie goers,you have been warned. As to the filmmakers,if you're going to make lousy movies,at least own up to it and revel in the hideous glory. Uwe Boll
is arguably one of the worst directors ever and yet,he's willing to truly take on his critics in the boxing ring. You have to give him some credit for that bit of brassy boldness there:
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